Wednesday, 26 August 2009
We are finally alone together this evening, after many days of hosting.
We are tired-out, emotionally frazzled, low.
Maybe it´s all the letdown after the big fiesta. Maybe it´s the feeling that summer is almost gone, that the cool evening wind has the first breath of autumn in it. Maybe it´s all the nastiness and conflict in the news: from the hateful healthcare culture wars in America, to a nasty mob of locals tossing out the monks who run the parish church in Rabanal del Camino.
Maybe we´re feeling our own aches and pains a bit more as we look at our three-legged dog and wonder if she really is cured, and when we hear about beloved cousins and friends now losing ground to cancer.
Failure has something to do with it. Instead of staying the three weeks originally intended, one of our long-term meant-to-be-helpful guests decided last night to cut short his stay and move on. He can´t take this place any more, he said.
We cannot be all things to all people. But in a couple of very real ways, we let this one down. Paddy doesn´t want to talk about it any more. Maybe I should not be writing anything. But just for the sake of balancing out all the "Happy Happy Joy Joy" I write here, you oughtta know this.
Sometimes it´s hard being here and doing this. Sometimes, no matter where you live, just living is hard work.